In Mexico, I drank too much tequila. Last night, Ian's feet were REALLY cold under the covers. I bought a Larry David lasagna from Marie Catrib's and Ian ate some of is, without permission. I never load the dishwasher correctly. I am desperate to buy a Moroccan shag for the living room.
All of this will become important later.
Also, is it just me, or is Nina Totenberg a national treasure?
Here we go--get to the point--Unless you've been living in a hole, then you're likely aware that the Supreme Court is currently hearing the same sex marriage case that was brought before them by the two nurses from Michigan--while the court isn't expect to rule until June, fingers are crossed nice and tight over here that they'll make the right choice and our children won't shake their heads in shame at us in 25 years, as we do about the once common ban on interracial marriage.
As a teacher in a fairly conservative area of Michigan, I am often in situations where I am navigating students who feel uncomfortable with same sex relationships. It's not uncommon for a student to say "something is SO gay" or to get "grossed out" by two girls kissing in the hallway. Even though I've made it clear to kids from day one that I don't approve of this disrespectful behavior, many still trip up from time to time (they're 14, I mean, it's understandable), and I find myself trying to help them navigate between kindness, tolerance, compassion and love. To many students, thankfully, this is a non-issue, but there are quite a few young people who bristle at the thought of sharing a classroom with a person who might be interested in the opposite gender that he/she is "supposed" to be.
It's a hard place as a teacher. I want to respect my students who feel deeply that their religion teaches them same sex relationships are not right, but at the same time, my very basic beliefs as a human are that love is love and that all of our human brothers and sisters deserve the right to be in love and proud of whom they love in this country. As a teacher, I want to provide my students a safe place to navigate these conversations, yet I must bite my tongue when they voice opinions that are very different than my own....yet I must make sure to keep a classroom of open-mindedness for my students who identify as members of the LGBTQ community. It is a constant struggle and one I am still navigating on a daily basis.
As the country awaits the Supreme Court decision, I anticipate we will all engage in many conversations regarding this issue. Already I've heard people engaging in the conversation, questioning the issues at hand here, referring to the origin of marriage--which is wonderful. A conversation of critical discourse and an evaluated opinion are certainly valid and I hope these informed conversations continue to happen around dinner tables, in classrooms and in running groups across the country.
Yet, at the end of the day, I do hope that kindness prevails. My friend, students, community members and family who are LGBTQ deserve the right to hold their love's hand and say to one another, "You are my husband. You are my wife."
"You are the person who will drive me crazy by loading the dishwasher incorrectly day after day. "
"You are the person who will help me pick out a rug for the living room, but not really care as long as I'm happy. "
You are the person who will hold my hair when I vomit tequila in Mexico. "
"You are the person who will save me the last bite of the Larry David lasagna from Marie Catrib's."
"You are the person who will put your cold feet on my cold feet at night and together we will warm each other's feet."
Love is love. It's simple. For all of those out there who think it is not, I just ask you to remember that we are all human. We all have hearts that beat and dreams that die. We have ideas that flourish and hopes that are shy. We have beliefs that are sacred and ideas that will fail. It's love. It's life. It's time.
WHEN the Supreme Court declares that same sex marriage is legal and a right for all our citizens, I plan to offer a special day of Pop Up weddings for all our LGBTQ brothers and sisters who have been denied this very basic right--stay tuned. It will be fantastic. And it WILL happen.